2022.01.26 05:28 untilthepunchline Wife doesn't want to do fun things with me
My (26, M) wife (26, F) just started at attending a new university in fall of last year. She's currently pursuing her undergrad degree after years of putting it off due to financial difficulty (her parents are divorced, mother is an alcoholic bum, dad doesn't make enough to pay university tuition).
Throughout last semester she continuously tried to make friends without success. When the semester first began, she expressed how she felt like she was too old and that being married was an obstacle because it made her seem lame and gave away her age. She went as far as telling me that I make her seem "uncool". That hurt me deeply as I've done nothing but love her with all my heart and have given everything for her, so I said that that was silly and that she should be herself and anyone that doesn't want to be her friend based on her age or relationship status isn't someone worth being friends with anyway.
Long story short, she blames the fact that she chose to listen to me about what I said, as she would mention that she was married in casual conversation, for her inability to make friends at her university. Everyone she attends school with is younger than 21. There are people that are in relationships, but almost nobody is married.
Thus, she's been going around this semester hiding her age and the fact that she is married. She doesn't make as much of an effort to conceal her age, as she does to avoid telling people she is married. She removed me as her phone wallpaper, and erased my presence from her Instagram. She is even weary about being seen on campus with me, and if we are on campus together, she is weird about PDA, even if it's low-key.
Which brings me to the point of this post. The state we moved to is a mountain state. People here are very outdoorsy. They hike, ski and snowboard, etc. Since we've moved here I had wanted to experience outdoor activities with her, since that is not a thing we commonly do where we are from. She's been on two hikes so far, without me. Once with her cousin and his wife who've lived here 5 years, and once with a person she met at school. She's also attending a jujitsu class tomorrow (outside of school), of which I am not invited to join. A few weeks ago she signed up for a yoga class and I expressed interest in doing yoga with her, but nothing came of it. I just found out that she's planning on going skiing/snowboarding with the same person she went on a hike with. She's made no mention of going snowboarding with me.
I've expressed to her that I feel as though she doesn't want to do fun things with me. That led to a really big argument in which she confessed to keeping our being married a secret as well as accused me of not wanting her to make friends. Regarding hiking, she invited me to come along on the one with her cousin and his wife, but I had work that day. I was never invited on the second hike with her school friend. She said that she does not want to scare off people by making them think that she is tied to me. Regarding jujitsu, she said that she doesn't want me to join her because it's embarrassing for her to learn a new skill like that around me, and she is worried about always being paired up with me during sparring and practicing. Regarding yoga, she said that she just wants to do that alone because she's always around me. I don't know what her reasoning is going to be for not asking me to go snowboarding with her.
The issue I have is that while there may be some validity in her reasoning, it's come to the point where we are not doing anything fun together, at all. I just don't feel loved or wanted by her. We're not just supposed to be husband and wife, but best friends. It's like she just wants nothing to do with me. When she's home, she just watches TV or reads until bed. Sometimes we go out to restaurants, but she usually just sits on her phone and hardly even tries to make conversation with me. We were going to the movies a lot because I'm a movie buff, but there hasn't been anything decent out in a little while. So yeah, we don't really do anything together.
I'm just curious what you all make of this. I feel like I'm losing my mind. I'm really hurt, but I know if I keep bringing it up, we'll just keep fighting.
I love my wife, I miss her, and I want to build memories with her. I don't feel like she wants the same.
submitted by untilthepunchline to relationship_advice [link] [comments]
2022.01.26 05:28 whaddup331 [18M] Half asleep & lonely while watching The Office
hi everybody! not really sure how to properly go about introducing myself on here, but ill give it my best shot haha.
my names Russell (well, not really, its my middle name but its what i prefer), im bisexual, and im from Canada. I’m not THAT interesting lol, life right nows pretty stagnant with covid and all, but I’d love to get to know anybody who’s also looking for somebody to contact!
Anyways, if anything ive wrote here interests you, feel free to message me!! :)
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2022.01.26 05:28 Free_Eggplant_2478 Need 2 for casino gold
2022.01.26 05:28 Zxytraza Was trying to get Musiala, why doesn't this work?
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2022.01.26 05:28 mynameiskwhy Oopsie
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2022.01.26 05:28 zen4ever99 Caitlin McCabe of WSJ reached out for a story on MOASS. I have pointed her to the DD.....
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2022.01.26 05:28 FlyingNNimbus Solo Confluxes - Season of the Lost [Destiny 2]
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submitted by assagitaz to progonlydj [link] [comments]
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2022.01.26 05:28 lochydjango r/Serverlife Subdirect Statistics
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